Hey everyone!! So this is kind’ve a last minute blog post but the Holy Spirit was knocking on my heart tonight to share this with y’all. So I am about to make a big transition and it’s the move from middle school to high school. I just finished 8th grade, and so now, I will enter high school as a freshman.
One day I sat down and I just wrote and reflected on my middle school years and how God has worked in my life over the past 3 years. I have definitely felt closer to him in such an amazing way and I have been able to do life easier because I know that the Lord is leading me. But, I have also dealt with a lot of spiritual warfare. There are times where I just can’t find a peace in anything. Sometimes I have doubts on whether I really am saved and if I am really chosen to be His. Sometimes, I have to be reminded that I NEED Jesus because I feel far from him.
One particular time was a few months ago. It was the week before dance tryouts and all I was feeling was stress and weakness. I felt like everything was just going wrong and again, I didn’t have a peace. But the thing is, I had no concentration on Jesus. I was focused on myself and what I had to do to satisfy myself.
That Saturday night, I remember praying that Jesus will make me realize how much I need him, now matter what it takes because I felt so far from Him. So, the next morning, I was getting ready for church, and I started balling crying. I couldn’t contain myself because I was so full of sin. But, in that moment, I knew that God had answered my prayer because of how much I needed him. The Lord had clearly placed that moment in my life where I just felt distress, so I would thirst for him.
So, when we got to church that Sunday morning, I was still really emotional, but I held it together pretty well. And then, our music leader played the offertory song. The song she played is called “Rock of Ages” by Sandra Mcckracken. The cool thing was, that was the song that was in my heart all morning as I couldn’t hold myself together. The song talks about how in our distress and suffering we come to our rock of ages who leads us safely home to him.
Y’all that was a Holy Spirit moment for me. I can’t even describe it, but it was like that whole week when I wasn’t peaceful and satisfied, God used that moment that Sunday morning to help me realize my need for him.
This is just one way that God has showed me grace and the endless love he has for me. Y’all, life is tough. It’s not some beautiful rainbow that our culture tries to make it. But when you know your need for Jesus, you can have a peace in the midst of spiritual warfare. So as I reflect back on that day, and as I’m about to take on high school, I can know that I am His chosen only by grace, and that nothing else will satisfy.
simplyblair 